A Life to Live

Do you remember how you got to recovery? They say “Play the tape forward” in the rooms, a lot. Sometimes we sit back and reflect on our lives for the good times and the bad times, preserving memories. Not for the lesson. Not to relive the experiences. Just for the wisdom that came from a life full of doing something.

In those times, what did your Higher Power offer you? Today you can be at peace knowing you survived something with the help and presence of your Higher Power. People cringe at the word “powerless”. Some rather replace it with surrender to lighten the blow. In this case, that something you survived was addiction. A place of powerlessness. We made it past the surrender part, making reservations after telling ourselves and others we would stop using. We were powerless when we pushed our responsibilities aside for our addiction.

To be powerless over your addiction only means you have to have it at all costs. At any cost. Nothing can stop you from getting your fix. It’s true: it’s not our fault we are like this. Time and time again, years upon years, we put ourselves through misery for a mood-altering substance causing actions we couldn’t manage just to temporarily feel good. 

Thought provoking question: What were we running from? What was so hard for us to cope with that we had to result in our addiction to feel better? Life – and to live life – is a beautiful thing. To jeopardize the main thing to be grateful for, we really couldn’t manage. We lost control by trying to control our surroundings instead of ourselves. It’s work that gets better over time. As said, “we didn’t become addicted in one day.” Our lives did become unmanageable but we can fix it through recovery and by staying clean.

Relax. Take it one day at a time; one hour by the time, if need be. Our worlds aren’t over yet.

Written by: Epiphany H.